Especially in large cities, ER staff have seen it all. Nevertheless, they do remember the especially creative things, which often involve the use of things in ways for which they were not designed, in body orifices not intended for metal, glass, and plastic.About 2AM one night, I was awakened by a call from a good friend, my first wife’s second ex-husband. He’s straight, and not especially kinky. After the divorce, though, he was lonely. He had gotten a job that he really enjoyed, as assistant manager of an independent office supply store. With the blessing of top management, he’d bring home merchandise, often to get a better understanding of how it could be used.One of the items that he brought home was a bottle of White-Out correction fluid for typed sheets. I recognize that a typewriter and typing is to many readers, is as ancient as keeping your food in a literal icebox, dressing up to fly in luxurious coach-class airliners, or having politicians that while opponents, respect one. You’re a good kid, keep up the cooking and work off that debt. Maybe the next time I come through here, there’ll be an English pub in the place of that throwback diner.”Matt nodded, stepping back as she kicked her ignition, the bike’s powerful engine roaring to life as Smoke scampered away from it to hide behind his master’s legs. She revved it, but the rumbling purr petered out into an unhealthy chugging before finally going silent. Matt didn’t know anything about motorcycles or engines, but even he could tell that this hollow clanking wasn’t normal. The woman leaned over to get a look at the exposed engine, cursing to herself.“Shit shit shit, fuck. Not now, not now!”She hopped off the bike and kneeled beside it, pulling off her helmet and placing it beside her on the dirt. She reached towards the metal and then cursed loudly, waving her hand as the hot engine burned her through her glove. Her frustration was palpable. Matt was almost afraid to offer help, watching her as she.
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